Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Bigger family

Nathan and I have always wanted to have a big family, even before we got married we talked about how having a lot of kids. He came from a family with seven kids and in the end I came from a family of four kids. We both love our siblings to pieces and cannot imagine a holiday or summer vacation without all the fun that siblings means. When we got pregnant with Hannah shortly after getting married we thought we were off to a great start! Fast forward eight years and no siblings for Hannah we decided that we were stable enough to start the adoption process, two weeks later, we were pregnant with twins. Funny how things work. Now the twins are about to turn three and we want more and I don't want to wait another eight years. We just became licensed foster parents. Why?
  1. We want a bigger family.
  2. We want a child that is closer to Hannah's age-or as Nathan says "fill in the gaps."
  3. We want to help kids.
  4. We can't sit and say that the most ideal place for children to be raised is within a two parent family that consists of a mom and a dad, and not be willing to help kids that don't have that opportunity.
  5. We want to adopt and we can't afford the $20k per child for private adoption.
So I know the questions that people have about this topic, so I will just answer few:
Is foster care and adoption safe?
Yes, we get to decide what we can handle as a family. We have decided that we cannot handle children that have safety issues such as cruelty to animals and others, sexual re-activeness, and violence. Plus we are teaching our children, all of them about modesty, the sacredness of our bodies, and safe boundaries.
Can you handle more kids?
Yes, we both know that more kids means more work, more trips to the doctor, visitation with birth parents, but sleepless nights. We also know that it means more hugs, more laughs, more tears, more band-aids, more groceries, and more love.
What is the thing you are most afraid of?
We are not afraid of what the kids bring to the table as far as behavior and disabilities, we have already had plenty of challenges with our birth children. Our greatest fear is getting attached to a child that becomes a part of the family and then having to let them go back to their birth family because everything is safe there. (Foster care lasts anywhere from 8-12 months in the state of Utah and then the child either returns to birth family, if it is safe, or becomes adoptable) But letting go is also a lesson, even our own birth children are not really ours, we are really raising them for a Father in heaven. They will always be a part of us and our families can be together forever, but we may not have them for long here in this life. Anyone who has had a miscarriage or a stillborn baby or has lost a child learns this lesson. But if a child gets to go back to their birth family that means that a family is doing better and overcome a huge challenge. That is also a victory.
Aren't you afraid of how this will impact your other kids?
No, because all changes in life, including siblings, affect us. We believe that having more siblings is good for our kids. Yes there will be bumps but there will also be awesome times too.

One of the foster care billboards in Utah says "Become a branch in someone else' family tree." This is what we want as couple and as a family. We haven't come to this decision lightly, it has been many years and countless hours of training and preparation. We are grateful for this opportunity.

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

Amelia Earhart is Found!


Thursday night Hannah's school will be presenting the 5th grade Wax Museum of American Heroes. Hannah chose Amelia Earhart and has done a wonderful job preparing. I wish I could post outtakes, but a picture will have to do. She is super cute, (and yes I know how creepy it is that she is my clone.) It brings back memories for me too.

Monday, November 1, 2010

Family Home Evening: Heroes



(One thing that we regularly do each week is have one night set aside to spend time together as a family at home. We may play a game together, rake leaves, go to the zoo, but we always have a short lesson about a timely topic. We have had lessons on honesty, tithing, honoring your father and mother, etc. I am going to start putting my lessons on the blog so I can remember what we have taught about and go back and re-use a lesson if I need too.)

This week's lesson: Heroes


Hannah has been working on a big school project all about American Heroes. She picked Amelia Earhart to present to the school for the 5th grade live Wax Museum. With Halloween just behind us I thought that it would be a good idea to look at what it means to be a hero, and what does being a hero have to do with being faithful and as the scriptures say 'stand as a witness of God at all times. (Mosiah 18:9)?

hero

1. a person distinguished by exceptional courage, nobility, fortitude, etc.

2. a person who is idealized for possessing superior qualities in any field

Standing as a witness of God involves both who we are and what we do. In order to be a witness of the Savior, we must strive to be like Him. This means setting a Christlike example for others through the clothes we wear, the words we speak, the music we listen to, the service we give, and the friends we make.

Take advantage of every opportunity to share your testimony of the gospel with others. Your beliefs may sometimes be questioned or challenged, but you can stand as a witness when you defend your testimony. You can also stand as a witness when you withstand temptation. You can ask Heavenly Father to help you have the courage to stand up for what you believe.

Standing as a witness of God will give you confidence and power because it means you are living as the Savior would have you live. If you are striving to be a witness of God, stand tall and remember that the Lord has promised eternal life to those who faithfully witness of Him (see Mosiah 18:9).
So I guess I am blogging again... I have lots to put up here, like that we moved to a new bigger house, that we are licensed foster parents now, and we are planning on adopting. I know it is like a big wildfire all the things I need to update people on. I will get to it all eventually. Honestly I thought no one was even reading this blog anymore and then today I see that there were comments, and people had visited. So I will try to be a little more entertaining and also add pictures.

Things I am working on this week:
  • FHE (family home evening) lesson: What is a HERO and what does it mean to 'stand as a witness of God at all times' (Mosiah 18:9)?
  • Hannah's Amelia Earhart costume for the 5th grade Wax Museum.
  • Handmade and Heartfelt Christmas gifts for all of my nieces and nephews. (We have 12 ranging in age from 2-14, so it is a challenge, but I have a killer idea!) Also gifts for our parents, also a pretty cool set of ideas.
  • Planning the Thanksgiving menu: We have 16 confirmed(including us) and a possible 5 more coming for dinner and I am so excited!
  • Put out Thanksgiving and fall decorations.
  • Start 25 days of gratitude journal.

Good Riddins' Halloween!



As much as I loved Trick-or-treating as a kid or love getting our 3 girls dressed up in cute little costumes, I really don't like what Halloween has become. The other day we were looking for a costume ideas for Nathan(for work) and we stopped at the Halloween City in a neighboring city. It is one of those Halloween places that is only open for like a month and a half, that takes over an abandoned Kmart or Circuit City building. We were really blown away by the costumes that were there. We had checked out the local Walmart and were a little disappointed in racey nature of everything, since when are Little Bo Peep or Alice in Wonderland sexy characters? What we saw at Walmart paled in comparison to the trash at this Halloween City, we left feeling gross, like we had just been tricked into walking through an Adult Bookstore-GROSS! If someone wants to dress up like a nurse/stripper, whatever that is their choice, but there was a costume that was basically an orange prison jumpsuit with a fly and a realistic looking plastic phallic. There was also a human breathalyzer with a blow here reference. It wasn't in a back room or in a clearly marked adult section, it was right there by the Where's Waldo costumes. People had their kids with them trying to find the latest princess or Star Wars dark lord. Kids don't need to see that trash and for that matter neither do adults. What happened to ghosts and cute goblins? I remember dressing up with my "step-twin" sister when we kids as cute little witches and our mom had made us little capes. Sometimes I really long for a simpler time when little girls costumes didn't include little garter belts. I am just grateful for the Thanksgiving season to finally be here.